RANDOM THOUGHTS by Trish

… not necessarily sane

Friday Fictioneers – Darkness

Posted on 03/02/2022 by trishsplace

#rochellewisofffields #flashfiction #fridayfictioneers

Photo prompt from Na’ama Yehuda

Oppression

desperation

claustrophobic disintegration.

I look up and see blue

flossy, puppy clouds

sunny side up

In the glass, reflected back

a total darkness

the oily snake of depression

The world is bleak

people hate-speak

children closet-weep

Darkness speaks.

walls bleed

they weep.

Inside my head

I wail

I flail, dispirited. (51 words)

Thank you Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for continuing to set this 100 word or less challenge. It is certainly a commitment appreciated by many. Other 100 word stories can be read here.

22 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers – Darkness”

Inside the Mind of Isadora on 08/02/2022 at 3:55 am said:

A wonderful expression of how everyone is feeling during these times.
Powerful words for only 51 words, well done.
Isadora 😎

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- trishsplace on 08/02/2022 at 7:13 am said:
  
  Thank you
  
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Brenda's Thoughts on 08/02/2022 at 2:05 am said:

A powerful and riveting poem of how many people feel in these days I would imagine. Well penned, Trish!

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- trishsplace on 08/02/2022 at 7:14 am said:
  
  Thanks!
  
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rochellewisoff on 07/02/2022 at 11:27 pm said:

Dear Trish,

Very powerful 51 words. I loved “children closet weep” Well done.

Shalom,

Rochelle

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- trishsplace on 08/02/2022 at 12:35 am said:
  
  Thank you Guru
  
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pennygadd51 on 07/02/2022 at 5:54 am said:

The ‘oily snake of depression’ is rather an arresting image. The poem is well constructed, Trish. If you’re the poem’s subject I hope very much that you escape the depression.

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- trishsplace on 07/02/2022 at 7:08 am said:
  
  Hello Penny, an observation of the state of the world. I don’t feel that dark. Thank you 🙂
  
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Margaret on 06/02/2022 at 7:00 pm said:

A grim scene. The rhythm is engaging, and the phrases ‘hate-speak’ and ‘closet-weep’ are a nice pairing.

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- trishsplace on 06/02/2022 at 9:02 pm said:
  
  Thanks Margaret
  
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Michael on 06/02/2022 at 5:33 am said:

A great use of words linked to the prompt

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Keith's Ramblings on 05/02/2022 at 2:04 am said:

Things can only get better – can’t they?

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GHLearner on 04/02/2022 at 11:40 pm said:

It will pass, I hope. A great poem.

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James McEwan on 04/02/2022 at 10:35 pm said:

Darkness has no depth, it is endless until you find a flicker of hope.

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plaridel on 04/02/2022 at 2:39 pm said:

51 words? more than enough i’d say. maybe the next 49 words will be sunny and bright.

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Bill on 04/02/2022 at 7:30 am said:

Well done. And 49 words you didn’t need. Extremely well done ‘beat’ poem, Trish.

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- trishsplace on 04/02/2022 at 8:39 am said:
  
  Appreciate that Bill
  
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oneta hayes on 04/02/2022 at 5:18 am said:

Aww. Sad. Nice structure.

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- trishsplace on 04/02/2022 at 10:08 am said:
  
  Thank you.
  
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Sandra on 03/02/2022 at 10:44 pm said:

I have days like that, too. Nicely done,

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- trishsplace on 04/02/2022 at 10:08 am said:
  
  Thanks Sandra
  
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neilmacdon on 03/02/2022 at 8:26 pm said:

I liked the image of the puppy clouds sunny side up with a dark underbelly

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